Lost in Translation

When all else fails, write about being a writer.

Someone once told me that, but I can’t remember who it was.

Well, here’s something interesting. I bought a book on Grammar, titled ‘My Grammar and I…Or Should That Be Me?’.

I pondered that title for a long time and decided that it should, in fact be My Grammar and Me.

Grammar being an object and me a pronoun. Yes, My Grammar is a subject and I is a subject pronoun, so they don’t go so well together. Point being, a pronoun follows a subject…I think. No, wait, it goes like this….

RULE: Always use and object pronoun (me) after a preposition. A preposition is placed before a noun or a pronoun….some other stuff goes in here, I know not what…

Have I lost you in translation? That’s okay, I usually know what sounds right, but I’m not always sure why. So, to confuse the issue, I bought this book and am mulling over parts of speech, sentence structure, punctuation, and elements of style.

Yup. (Not a word, I’m aware…) A lot to take in. One thing I did find out was that ‘alot’ is in fact, NOT A WORD either….should be ‘a lot.’

Hey but that’s the thing about being a writer. The stupider you write, the more clever you look to those who know even less about writing than you do.

EXCEPTION TO THE RULE: Some people read your stupid writing and just presume that you write stupid all the time, because yu don’t know any better, so ya, I’d be careful there.

So, how do you convince smarter writing people, that you aren’t as stupid as you write? Don’t bother, they are already convinced…NOT…

And what the heck is a predicate again? Sorry, mind is wandering….

HHHMM, let’s see if the opposite holds true…

If yore writing is exceptionally clever, than how do you convince the less clever? I don’t think you can. They won’t be able to tell the difference between your stupid writing and your clever writing. They’re not clever enough.

EXCEPTION TO THE RULE: Asforementioned, some will think your writing is  extremely clever, they just won’t know why. But, they will still think you are stupid…

More other blah, blah, blah stuff goes here…

Some other clever writey stuff should be in here….but it just isn’t.

And for that, I apologize.

PARTING SHOT: If you are talking about yourself and another person, it is good manners to mention the other person first….


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