Can You See Me Now?


I recently read several different articles on how women over 50, not only disappear from the radar, they become completely invisible.

Oh, I know this is true.

“Nice ass” has been replaced by “Nice ass grandma”. O U C H.

The only time someone really looks me in the eye is when they are offering me a seat on the bus. I appreciate the sentiment, but not the sentiment behind it. I am still steady on my feet thanks, I may even be on the way to bowling. I won’t collapse on a ten minute bus ride if I’m not sitting. Maybe they are just respecting their elders. Thanks, but respect someone more elder than me. I’m okay, really I am.

I’ve stood patiently in line, had people look right at me, then move in front of me. I have a standard comeback I like to use in this situation, and I’ve used it a lot lately.

Excuse me, but the line starts behind me.

You should see the look of shock on their faces. Someone invisible just spoke to them. How odd. Yes, get your hearing checked, and you might want to have an eye test. I am not going to become invisible because society says I should.

Funny, when I was younger, I did everything to become more invisible. I was shy and retiring and liked to remain in the background because more often than not, I felt socially awkward. I never fought for anything, never competed, never finished anything I started and  never expected that life would change me in ways I could hardly imagine.

But it did. And along with those changes, I became more sure of myself, more sure of what I wanted and where I was going. I had a better sense of direction and I was finally starting to head there.

That is until I found out I’m now almost completely invisible, or at least I’m supposed to be, and when it comes to matters of the heart, I’ve been invisible since I was 30 apparently. Wow, who knew? I always thought it was fate, but knowing it’s because I’m invisible, well, that just makes it so much easier to deal with.

My first clue should have been when I was called ‘Ma’am’ for the very first time. I thought to myself…hhmm, someone just called me ma’am, I hope I am appropriately dressed for the occasion. Sensible shoes, bundle buggy, flowered hat, white gloves etc.

I’m not going down without a fight. So be afraid…be very afraid. From the generation that wasn’t going to take it at 21. What makes you think we’ll take it at 50?

I’m more likely to voice my opinion at my age, and more likely to be right. I’ve had years of experience to fall back on. I have a lot more courage than I did at 25, am much more comfortable with who I am as a person. I try to surround myself with positive energy, I have no time for other people’s noise. I keep in shape, I don’t eat junk food, and I know my limits.

Any one who can survive to half a century is surely not invisible and they should not be so easily discounted.

There is years of wisdom in those over 50, and maybe that is what some are afraid of. We know something they don’t know, so it’s easier to ignore us, hope we go away, and leave it at that.

REALITY CHECKNot invisible, never was, never will be…the line starts behind me. And you can bet it will be a long one….

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